I’m a Superstar

For several reasons

1) Mike didn’t cut me from his links section. That’s sort of like winning the lottery.

2) I survived the wrath of Lindsay’s rage that was prompted by my reply-posts. That’s just plain ol' divine intervention.

3) I learned how to stop on skates today. Like…HOCKEY stop. This is huge, people. It’s been a winter of baby-steps (and stops), and today I spent an hour skating and stopping my way home from the Ottawa Humane Society. A girl even giggled at me and we chatted for 20 minutes while I practiced and she twirled. As I no longer look like a giant ball of awkward on skates anymore, this experience was like reliving adolescence; I’m finally able to predict the way my body moves, and still afraid to ask a girl for her phone number.

Focus on the skating, people – and skate with me someday to witness Newton’s Third Law in action.

Radicalized by Chess

Sigh. I love The Economist because they occasionally write business articles that I understand.

In other enjoyable news, this picture brings me back to the glory days of chess club.


And that, ladies and gentlemen, also explains why I participated in band, choir, debating, and yearbook. I feared what social contact the free lunch period held, and thus became an (arguably) better man because I learned early on that Kings could never topple Queens. I also had a bitchin' haircut just like this guy, whom I like to call Johnny.

So go.

Go, Johnny. Go- Go-GO.

Confessions of the Heart

FINE. I admit that I’m a terrible blogger.

I’ve known this about myself for quite some time, but I always thought my past indiscretions were innocent. Then I lied to my dear and loyal reader/friend Mike.

Mike: I’m sorry I swore on our friendship that I’d update – and then swore on it six more times when you called me out for not taking action. I know that I’m a self-absorbed schmuck, and I apologize for devaluing those precious months we spent squatting somewhat illegally in the Brosha household back in the day (Remember Thor? Creepy.). I also apologize for making a mockery of what should potentially be a genuine apology.

Nonetheless, I think I’m okay with it.

SO…..

As it’s a little late for holiday updates (even though Hallmark defines Valentine’s Day as one), I’m simply going to share my new favourite popular European expression with you…

“A nation is a group of people united by a common error about their ancestry and a common dislike of their neighbours.”

- Quoted in Karl Deutsch, Nationalism and Its Alternatives.

In a related story – the identification of this quote as ‘European’ didn’t seem to concern my homeboy Deutsch all that much. I was gonna give him double props – but now he just gets one prop….s (?).

[Could someone PLEASE tell me what these ‘props’ are that I keep giving people? Seriously. If the drama of life isn’t providing me with any directorial cues, it should at least provide me with a furniture list.

Too far?

Perhaps.]

Alright. I’m heading over to Loeb to assess their stockpile of Valentine’s Day chocolate and plan my strategy for tomorrow’s MAD discounts. Who cares where the love is when you can have TOBLERONE?!